Oh my god, they made a movie version of one of my favourite comics(if you're Scottish - you read 2000AD). WHY GOD WHY?
I was at a comic convention a few years ago, where the most popular event was the Judge Dredd screening, with commentary by Alan Grant(who has written it for years). We watched the opening montage of comics, and as soon as that had passed, Alan stopped the movie saying 'that's the best part in the movie' - yeah, he was right 🙂
We watched on, with Stallone dominating the majority of the screen, a friend sitting next to me recounted the tale of Stallone winning best actor at the french equivalent of the Oscars - he got up on the podium and just said 'uuuuh, merci' - he knew it was a stinker, we knew it was a stinker, and the french were obviously taking the mickey : )
I knew all was lost when Stallone took his helmet off( a helmet which Judge Dredd creator Carlos Esquerra couldn't put on because it was too small!!!!) - old stoneface never took his helmet off in the comics, but the studio obviously needed their Stallone dollar - why i oughtta!! The only good things in the movie were Mean Machine - who was true to form, the cameo by ian dury(that's a lawgiver!! take your bleedin arm off!), and the lil in-jokes for 2000ad readers - like the chopper smiley on the statue of liberty(blink and you'll miss it!) Other than that, it's a stinky little Stallone vehicle that should be avoided at all cost!!
Editor's Note: You'll notice I'm not linking to this movie at all. Yup, that's on purpose. I will however show off some rad comics and graphic novels!
Boy, I bet if you had to guess, you wouldn't even think I knew where the furrin section was in the video store. Well, I guess we are both wrong. Delicatessen has become my new favorite post-apocalyptic movie of all time. It adds so much to the "genre". (See, I'm even usin fancy words and junk.) Here is just a taste.
First of all, it's interesting that there seems to be some vestiges of civilization left. I think that's pretty realistic. Then, the goofy stuff they add completely makes it. The troglodytists or whichever. They reminded me of the cursed earth mutates in Judge Dredd comics... wait... I'm getting this mixed up. I think there are real troglodyte characters in Judge Dredd too... Anyway, the images in this movie make it supreme.
Don't get me wrong, I don't know anything about camera angles, lighting or whatever. All's I know is that these guys knew what they were doing. Everything had this hyper-real color to it. When they'd show the butcher's face and evil grin... it looked perfect.
This movie had many images and ideas in it that (As far as I know) have never been done before. I mean, filling a bathroom with water to escape an angry mob? A big group of civilized happy cannibals? A man who lives half submerged in water with an army of frogs and snails? I'd like to meet someone who didn't care for this movie. Just so's I could punch them in the face.
Note: This original review was written sometime during 1996-1997, when I was a drunken, twenty-something nincompoop. I am no longer that person. Or, that is to say, I am in my thirties now.